lonely

Machine Gun Kelly's father, James Baker, passed away on July 5, 2020, a few months before the release of his Tickets to My Downfall album. They had a tumultuous relationship as his dad suffered from depression and couldn't cope with his son getting into trouble all the time. He finally kicked Kelly out of their house post-high school. They eventually patched up their differences, and this song finds MGK missing his father. Lonely, lonely, even when the room is full I'm lonely, lonely, lonely without you After Kelly's mom left home when he was nine, he and his father moved in with his aunt. She died of cancer in July 2017; he also speaks of missing her. And then she said goodbye way too soon And this don't feel right without you

Kelly wrote the song with Tickets to My Downfall producer Travis Barker. He explained to Spin that he already had a concept of a song about his aunt, who was his closest family member. When he lost his father too, Kelly called the blink-182 drummer, who allowed him to have a cathartic moment in the booth by sharing his grief. "That song is like the house, you know, they both were in the house, and they both are in that song," he said. "It was either take it in that song or I would have found some other way, which would have been much less friendly to myself to get my anger and pain and grief out."

Kelly's actress girlfriend Megan Fox encouraged the musician to ask his father questions during their last times together. This song culminates in an audio snippet of the final conversation he had with his dad when James Baker told his son about how he was born with the umbilical cord around his neck. "I was encouraged by someone to ask about my life, knowing that this could be the last time I was able to find out certain truths," Kelly told Kerrang. "I ultimately chose to put it on the album because it can maybe help people understand my psyche a little more, that even before I came out of the womb, I was already trying to take myself out of this world - almost feeling like I shouldn't be here or something."