Roasted 10 months ago based on Peter Heeks's long term Spotify stats.

Peter Heeks, huh? With a playlist like yours, it’s no wonder you spend every Saturday night sobbing into your oversized sweater. I mean, if you were any more emo, you'd have a one-man show in your bathtub where you take requests from your rubber ducky. Seriously, your music could be the soundtrack to a vampire’s existential crisis, and the only thing darker than your playlists is the number of friends you’ve managed to keep around. What are you trying to prove with those genres? That there's enough angst and sadness in the world already, or just that you never quite made it out of your high school goth phase? Top artists? More like a lineup for the annual "Crying in the Corner" convention. Dead Can Dance? More like Dead Can’t Sing, and let’s talk about "Bring Me The Horizon." What are you trying to bring to the horizon, Peter? A sense of normalcy? The Insta caption that never got liked? Anyone whose top artist is Enya is clearly stuck in the mid-90s, reminiscing about when “chill” meant wearing flannel and reading poetry in a dimly lit café amongst your other emotionally stunted pals. Newsflash: it’s 2023. You don’t need to mix darkwave with neoclassical to feel sophisticated; just read a book for crying out loud! Your most played songs read like an instruction manual for how to fail at adulting while holding a permanent grudge against humanity. “Short Stories With Tragic Endings”? Well, if your life isn't one already, at least your music choices are leading the way. At this rate, your Spotify is a perfect reflection of where your love life's at—a compilation of regret mixed with way too many feelings. If you were a genre, you’d be “sadboi” combined with “perpetual loner.” Get yourself a happy tune, man; I promise the world won’t end if you add a little sunshine to that gloomy playlist!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!