Roasted 1 year ago based on Jochem's long term Spotify stats.

Jochem, your Spotify profile reads like the soundtrack to a Renaissance Fair that’s gone horribly wrong. Seriously, the only thing missing from your playlist is a rabid squirrel singing sea shanties while trying to steal a pint of ale. With a lineup boasting more Celtic tunes than an Irish pub on St. Patrick's Day, I half-expect your headstone to read, “Here lies Jochem, who lived and died on a steady diet of pirate metal and folk punk.” At least if you get buried at sea, you’ll have the perfect ambiance for your Viking funeral—complete with the appropriate soundtrack! And don't even get me started on those top artists. You’ve got a mix of Irish folk heroes and hardcore legends that would be more confused than a cat at a dog park. I mean, how does Eminem fit in the lineup alongside “The Irish Rovers” and “Heilung”? It’s like you’re gearing up for a bizarre music festival where the main acts are shouting “Yo, Marshall!” from one stage while a bunch of pirates play “Drunken Sailor” in the background. Congratulations, Jochem! You’ve officially created the most perplexing DJ set ever—one that would give a seasoned bard an existential crisis. Your most played songs are an even stranger spectacle. “Sally MacLennane,” sure, but then you throw in “The Real Slim Shady” like it’s an acoustic cover for an after-party at a tavern. You’re oscillating between sword-fighting an enemy and rapping about mom’s spaghetti like it’s totally normal. Spoiler alert, it’s not; it’s the musical equivalent of wearing a kilt with Crocs. So take a good look at this mess of a profile, Jochem, because it’s either a cry for help or you just really want to be the captain of a ship that sinks before it leaves port. Either way, brace yourself for the next round of mockery, because you’re in uncharted waters!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!