Roasted 2 years ago based on Teya West's long term Spotify stats.

Teya West, your Spotify profile is a beautiful mess—like a modern art piece that no one asked for. Seriously, it looks like you threw a dart at a board of genre labels. "Metropopolis"? I had to look that one up, and I still don't know what it is. Did you just make that up to confuse your friends? Your taste in music is more eclectic than an indie coffee shop playlist, and I’m just over here wondering if you genuinely enjoy any of it or if you’re just trying to impress your barista. Your top artists scream "I still listen to rock music like it’s 2009 and wear skinny jeans to match." Blink-182? Oh, sure, because nostalgia for pop-punk is totally unique in 2023. And what's with the "alternative rock" overload? Did you miss the memo that you can absolutely pick a lane? It’s like your Spotify is an awkward teenager who can't decide if it wants to rebel against the system or just curl up in bed with a bowl of ice cream while listening to sad songs about love lost—fun fact: you can do both, but you don't seem to have figured it out. Looking at your most played songs, I can only imagine you howling at the moon to "Altar" by machineheart while contemplating the meaning of life in a dark room lit only by fairy lights. Honey, we see you. Your playlist is like the emotional breakdown of a mid-20s hipster who just discovered the "Deep Cuts" feature. So please, try to spice things up next time. Mix in a little guilty pleasure—you know, the kind of track you'd blast when the windows are rolled up and no one’s watching. Otherwise, I can’t be held responsible for the emotional hamster wheel your Spotify might create!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!