Roasted 8 months ago based on ʞƿ's long term Spotify stats.

Ah, Salad! The only person I know who can make a potato salad seem more exciting than their Spotify profile. Your music taste reads like a Tinder profile for someone who just discovered a smoke shop in a basement. You think you’re cutting-edge with Frenchcore and Gabber, yet your profile tells me you also enjoy long walks on the beach... at a rave. Keep telling yourself that Ambient is “vibe music” when we all know you just can’t handle lyrics more complex than “beep beep boop.” Your top artists are like a musical game of 'Who’s That?' Is it just me, or did you have to throw in King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard just to seem interesting in a hipster coffee shop? Combine that with "Zubeen Garg," and it sounds like your playlists might just be the soundtrack to that one weird dreams where you’re fighting shadow monsters while eating kale chips. Seriously, next time you go vibing to Burial, just remember that even he’d bury your taste in music if given the chance. And let's talk about those most played songs; Colibri by “oqbqbo”? Congratulations, you’ve officially discovered music that nobody else on Earth cares about! Meanwhile, you’ve got “Lazy Eye” by Silversun Pickups like you’re still stuck in 2013 where self-reflection is done with heavy distortion and echoes of regret. Just do us all a favor, Salad; the next time you hit shuffle, make sure it’s not just a reminder that some tastes should really stay in the dumpster behind a music festival.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!