Roasted 7 months ago based on Beatriz Valentim's long term Spotify stats.

Oh, Bia, your Spotify profile is basically a virtual crypt for the music that even the Grim Reaper wouldn't want to listen to on repeat. Seriously, with favorites like Gothic Rock and Darkwave, I’m not sure whether to applaud your unique taste or send you a flashlight and a map out of this musical mausoleum. If your playlist were a person, it would probably have its own Netflix special titled "In Search of Sunshine." You’ve made the perfect case for why some genres should come with a warning label: “Doom Ahead!” And let’s discuss your top artists for a moment—The Cure, Lacrimosa, and Depeche Mode. It’s like someone asked you to collect the most melodramatic musicians of the last four decades. At this point, you must be so immune to happiness that a cheerful pop song might send you into a spiral of existential dread. If your Spotify account were a person at a party, it would be that one friend who corners people to discuss the symbolism of black roses while the rest of us are busy trying to have a good time. But hey, I have to give you credit: topping it off with Gregorian Chant is just chef’s kiss. Because, of course, nothing says “I have friends” like a choir of monks chanting about eternal damnation. And may I point out your most played songs? Bach and Handel? My God. Are you trying to audition for the role of an 18th-century sad boy? If your playlists get any more pretentious, I’ll need a degree in musicology just to decipher your melancholic vibes. But that’s you, Bia—the proud owner of a Spotify jail cell filled with tunes that scream for attention while simultaneously pushing everyone away. Bravo!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!