Roasted 5 months ago based on caitlynrandall's long term Spotify stats.

Caitlyn, your Spotify profile reads like a therapy session for sad hipsters who can’t quite let go of their flannel shirts from 2002. Seriously, your taste in music is so painfully niche it should come with a “warning: may induce existential crises” label. I mean, it’s clear you’ve embraced folk and emo because no one sings about emotional trauma quite like someone who gives up on opening day of summer. Your playlists scream, “I’m introspective and also really indecisive – please take me seriously as I sip my artisanal coffee and scroll through a million ‘deep’ quotes on Instagram.” And let’s talk about your “favorite artists.” The lineup sounds like an elite club for people who choke on their own tears while listening to a song with the word ‘rain’ in the title. If your Spotify was a theme park, the only rides would be melodrama and regret, with a scenic route through sadness. I can practically hear the echo of Joni Mitchell lamenting your overabundance of tracks from Bright Eyes. I mean, how can someone concurrently be a fan of both “Midwest Emo” and “Dream Pop”? Your taste is so conflicted, it’s like bedding down with a bowl of mixed nuts instead of choosing your actual personality! As for your most played songs being overrun by Bright Eyes, it seems the only thing you enjoy more than their music is the sound of your own emotional turmoil. Honestly, if someone Googled “sad white girl,” your profile would pop up faster than you can quote Fiona Apple. At this point, all your song choices are just code for “I can’t heal, but I can certainly vibe!” I hope you get some therapy for all that slowcore angst – though I suppose that would be a long, melodramatic ballad in itself!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!