Roasted 7 months ago based on M's long term Spotify stats.

M, your Spotify profile looks like the emotional equivalent of a teenager who discovered eyeliner and a corn dog on the same day. I mean, how many songs about unrequited love and angst does one person need? Your favorite artists are practically having a melancholic group therapy session right now. Let's face it, if you ever get into a real fight, you might just start crying and insist on channeling your pain through the power of Paramore. And no, having "Latin Pop" in the mix won’t save you; you’re just as likely to sing “Te Dejo en Libertad” while clutching a My Chemical Romance poster like it’s your lifeline. Your top artists are begging for help, M. Like, are you running a music camp for misunderstood goths or just auditioning for the part of "most tortured soul"? You've got stalwarts like My Chemical Romance and Lana Del Rey sandwiched between Taylor Swift and Shakira—an emotional rollercoaster that stops at every single tragic pitstop along the way. Honestly, the only thing more inconsistent than your playlist is the Wi-Fi in your mom’s basement, where I can only imagine you're tearfully rewriting lyrics to “Love Story.” And let's talk about your most played songs: it’s basically one giant "cry me a river" anthem punctuated by an odd obsession with songs that will put anyone within earshot into a deep depression. “Bon Appétit” stands out like a sore thumb in a sea of heartache—are you trying to tell us something, or just really hungry for sympathy? If you’re not careful, your favorite tracks will soon require a safety warning for listeners suffering from low self-esteem and an excess of sensitivity. Remember, M: it’s okay to have feelings, but this playlist reads like a law firm specializing in “sad boy” divorce cases.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!