Roasted 9 months ago based on Paul's long term Spotify stats.

Oh Paul, your Spotify profile is like a playlist of misunderstandings—who knew the person bumping "EDM" at the gym would also have a soft spot for K-Pop and chillstep? You’ve curated a collection that feels like the musical equivalent of wearing Crocs with socks while riding a unicycle. You’ve got more genres than I have friends, and I’m honestly just trying to figure out if this is a potential therapy playlist or a cry for help. Looking at your top artists, it’s clear you’ve embraced emotional whiplash like a pro. One moment you're vibing to Said The Sky, and the next you’re lamenting about your love life to Sabrina Carpenter. I mean, come on, the only thing more melodramatic than ILLENIUM’s drops is your inability to decide whether you want to rave it out or just sob uncontrollably into your pillow. You’ve got more mood swings than a teenager during finals week—at least commit to one aesthetic! And then we get to your most played songs; it’s like you accidentally pressed shuffle on your life’s regrets. “Touching Yourself” by The Japanese House feels like an anthem for your current dating situation, and “Cherry Pie (I think I love you)”—is that really how confident you are, or do you just like food puns too much? I’m honestly impressed you haven’t cracked under the pressure of your musical schizophrenia. But hey, if nothing else, you’ll always have a soundtrack for your midlife crisis. Keep streaming, my confused friend; maybe someday you’ll pick a lane!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!