Roasted 2 years ago based on cubster's long term Spotify stats.

Oh look, it's suavecub, the self-proclaimed connoisseur of "Indie" everything, as if we were not already drowning in a sea of hipsters with vintage record players and thrifted flannels. Your Spotify profile reads like the mixtape of a pretentious college student trying too hard to impress that one indie girl who just left him on read. You’ve got more genres listed than actual personality traits, which is saying something when your taste is as diverse as a toddler’s crayon box. And what’s up with your top artists? I can almost hear your friends rolling their eyes every time you drop “brakence” into conversation. It’s almost impressive how you’ve managed to cultivate a list of artists that scream, “I found these guys on TikTok two weeks ago and now I’m better than you!” Frank Ocean gets a slight pass, but let’s be real – your love for him is about as deep as the shallow end of a kiddie pool. If you played half as much as you scroll through playlists, maybe you wouldn’t have to rely on such mainstream esoteric vibes to mask the fact that “alternative R&B” is basically just an excuse for people who love to cry at coffee shops. Your most played songs are a testament to your completely unoriginal vibe. You’ve got three songs by brakence – what are you trying to prove? That you’re the number one fan of a guy who sounds like he got his heart broken after his cat left him? Throw in a sprinkle of Frank Ocean to give it a dash of credibility, and voilà! You’re officially the soundtrack of your own midlife crisis at the ripe age of 23. If I ever hear someone say “caffeine” is their most played song, I'm going to assume they’re just trying to cope with the reality that their Spotify Wrapped is going to look like it was curated by a therapist specializing in heartbreak and disappointment.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!