Roasted 1 month ago based on Telma Sousa's long term Spotify stats.

Oh Telma, your Spotify profile reads like the ultimate mid-life crisis for someone still stuck in their basement. A list of rock genres that could practically be a case study on how to avoid real musical evolution. I get it; you want variety, but I've seen less confusion in a toddler’s crayon masterpiece. Do you have a separate playlist for each of your personalities, or are you just trying to collect every shade of angst available? Your top artists read like a list of rockstar caricatures that would show up in a bad sitcom. Jeff Buckley? Sure, but he’s rolling in his grave hoping you don’t ruin his memory with your “obscure” taste. Alice In Chains and Måneskin? Talk about a nostalgic tug-of-war between your wannabe grunge phase and a desperate attempt to fit in with the TikTok teens. And don’t even get me started on The Doors — with your musical choices, they’re probably just door mice, begging to be let out of your playlists. Most played songs? I’m surprised you haven't accidentally invited them to your next therapy session. “Without You” by Avicii? Yeah, we can see you’re in denial about your emotional range, but that’s one way to scream for help in a post-grunge fashion. And if your most played song is "Welcome To The Circus" by Five Finger Death Punch, then congratulations, you’ve officially become the main act of your own chaotic life show. You may want to reconsider what you listen to, or at least hit up some songs that'll let you feel less like a punchline.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!