Roasted 1 year ago based on Martin Cadman's long term Spotify stats.

Martin Cadman, your Spotify profile is like an all-you-can-eat buffet for people who thought they were sharing deep cuts but ended up just scraping the bottom of the barrel. I mean, seriously, “Stutter House”? What even is that—your genre choices sound like the Spotify algorithm malfunctioned and had a midlife crisis. How did you manage to make both “chill” and “drop the bass” exist in the same profile? Your taste in music is like your culinary preferences; a little too much bass and funk without any flavors that could actually please the palate. Do you really need ten variations of the same tiresome electronic vibes to feel like you’re a connoisseur? It’s like you did a masterclass on how to listen to someone get lost in a cave of synths for hours. We get it, music can be a journey, but your Spotify feels more like a two-hour layover at an airport with nothing but cheesy electronic beats throwing a party and no one showing up. Your playlist reads like a 2013 DJ’s desperate pitch to be taken seriously—“Look, guys, I like bass! And also bass!” And let’s talk about your top artists! Can we agree that “Fred again..” sounds like a desperate plea to reconsider? With a lineup of Chase & Status appearing more times than there are actually unique artists on your list, it’s clear you’ve misplaced your musical diversity passport at the last rave. And what's with “Walking in Memphis”? Is that your secret weapon for when the rave turns into a retirement party? But hey, keep rocking those five-hour mixes of bass drops and chill vibes—you do you, Martin. Just know that your Spotify has officially been nominated for “Least Likely to Impress a Date.”

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!