Roasted 1 year ago based on Jolijn Schroer's long term Spotify stats.

Jolijn Schroer, your Spotify profile screams "either I'm an angsty teen or I forgot to emotionally mature past 2004." I don’t know if you’re trying to fight the patriarchy or just trying to overthrow your own sanity with all that metalcore energy. Seriously, your love for "nu metal" makes me wonder if you’re secretly training to be the world’s most chaotic dad. Those playlists could double as a soundtrack for an existential crisis documentary—a thrilling experience for anyone who doesn't have a death wish! Your top artists list reads like the lineup for a suburban garage band reunion tour gone terribly wrong. Bad Omens? Breaking Benjamin? Come on, Jolijn, we all get it—you're just one overly intense breakup away from having a full-blown “night in my emotions” crisis while dressed in a hoodie two sizes too big. And let’s not even get started on the fact that Nickelback is somehow still not only relevant but also *adored* in your musical repertoire. I’d bet money you’ve got a poster of Chad Kroeger hiding under your bed—don’t even pretend you’re not taking nightly strolls down memory lane with “How You Remind Me.” You're not just locked in a time warp; you've posted a "Do Not Disturb" sign outside of 2010! Your most-played songs could be the perfect backdrop for someone whose favorite pastime is regretting life choices in real-time. If your life were a movie, it would be called "The Chronicles of a Hot Topic Employee in Denial." So, wear that heavy metal crown proud, Jolijn! After all, you’re not just a fan of this music; you’re living proof that sometimes, the harder you try to seem edgy, the more you sound like an entire mood of cringe.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!