Roasted 2 years ago based on Liam Schmalstieg's long term Spotify stats.

Liam Schmalstieg, huh? Your Spotify profile reads like a playlist made by a 35-year-old dad who's really trying to impress the kids, but can't quite shake off the comfy nostalgia of '85. With favorite genres that sound like an ad for a classic rock radio station's desperate bid to stay relevant, it’s no wonder the only thing harder than your rock selections is the sound of people trying to pretend they’re thrilled by your musical taste. "Permanent Wave"? What are you, the last remaining member of a cover band for your own regrets? Your top artists read like a trivia night gone wrong, as if everyone on that list just got kicked off the island of Cool. Sure, we’ve all heard of legends like The Beatles and David Bowie, but throw in a few names like Electric Light Orchestra, and suddenly it's like a time capsule to the days when nobody cared if you were 'only' a fan of dad rock. And let’s not pretend that Billy Joel's contributions to music are keeping anyone awake at night. I mean, ‘Weezer’? You’d think your top artist was a '90s high school English assignment required to use "Buddy Holly" as a reference. And your most played songs… Wow. A mix where "Clean White Noise - Loopable with no fade" sits comfortably beside D'Angelo? One minute you're feeling "Unshaken," and the next you're knocked out cold by the banality of it all. It’s genuinely hard to listen to your playlist without feeling like I’ve been invited to a party where the snacks are all expired. Seriously, Liam, if we wanted a lyrical tour through a midlife crisis, we'd just look to your browsing history to see how you stumbled into "Cartoon" by Soul Asylum while trying to relive the days before Wi-Fi. Step it up, buddy; your Spotify should reflect a bit more of that hard rock attitude instead of what looks like your search history for 'palatable background noise.'

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!