Roasted 2 years ago based on Crystal's long term Spotify stats.

Oh, Crystal! Looking at your Spotify profile feels like stumbling into a 2009 anime convention where everyone is still desperately trying to convince themselves that their obsession with Vocaloid DM'ed them a real personality. Your favorite genres read like someone poured red bull on a mix of a hipster art student’s diary and an otaku's dream journal from their third year of hiding in their parents' basement. "Anime Rock" and "J-Pop"? Sweetie, unless you have a waiver from reality, it’s time to acknowledge that your playlists should come with a complimentary dose of sunlight and social skills. Your top artists are a beautiful medley of pure, unfiltered niche—makes me wonder if you've got a secret pact with your Wi-Fi connection to keep you eternally trapped in the world of virtual Japanese music. I mean, “The Living Tombstone”? You clearly spend your weekends watching gameplay videos while crying into your custom-printed anime body pillow. And darling, “Olivia Rodrigo" sneaks in there like that one friend who crashes the party and then overshares their existential crisis with the entire guest list. Where are the bangers? My ears are begging for mercy! And let's not even get started on your "most played" songs—congratulations, you've achieved peak eavesdropper who stalks the corners of Spotify like a raccoon looking for dumpster snacks! With songs like “WTF 2 slowed,” I can only assume you've come to terms with your questionable taste. A sad mix of angst, confusion, and a dash of "I should really call my therapist" vibes. But hey, keep on jamming! You’re our little reminder of what happens when you dive into a rabbit hole and forget to come back up for air. Keep thriving, Crystal, the world needs your glorious chaos!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!