Roasted 2 years ago based on SK's long term Spotify stats.

Alright, Steve Kelly, let’s talk about this Spotify profile of yours. With a favorite genre list looking like a high school “most likely to wallow in angst” superlative, it’s clear you went straight from wearing black eyeliner to binge-watching emo music videos on YouTube. Your Spotify tastes are basically the auditory equivalent of one long, sad Instagram story that ends with a lil' cliche about growth while using the same filter together with that same old dress that doesn’t fit anymore. Let’s face it, your playlist should come with a warning: “May induce high blood pressure and existential dread.” And can we discuss your top artists? Sleep Token and Deftones? Wow, did you somehow get stuck in 2005 and explore every dark corner of a Hot Topic clearance sale? If Billboard ever needed a spokesperson for “Best Emotional Breakdown,” we’re certain they’d just play your top tracks on a loop until everyone fled the building. You’ve got more moods than a hormonal teenager – one minute you’re slamming down on metalcore, the next you're vibing with Billie Eilish like your life is just one big whispery existential crisis. Seriously, you could be the poster child for the "Why Won’t Someone Hug Me?" club. And the most played songs list? Buddy, I can’t tell if you’re cultivating a vibe or just desperately trying to make every moment sound poignant while calling it a “playlist.” “Nice For What” thrown in for good measure feels like you’re trying to be relatable with Drake while secretly crying to "Routine Pain." It’s a musical identity crisis begging for attention. Do us all a favor and switch it up; because if I hear about another “Ascensionism” or “PUNK TACTICS,” I might just have to stage an intervention and hand you a Bright Eyes album for some serious emotional rehabilitation.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!