Roasted 2 years ago based on David's long term Spotify stats.

David, your Spotify profile reads like a guide for parents trying to bribe their toddlers into napping. I half expect your favorite genres to include "Screaming Match" and "Wailing Nonsense." I mean, “British Children’s Music”? Are you secretly plotting to start a nursery home with a side of tea and crumpets, or do you just want to be a kiddie DJ for life? Either way, it's legitimately concerning that your idea of a balanced playlist is more Mickey Mouse than Mozart. Your top artists could double as a daycare’s playlist, and with all due respect, how does "Eminem" fit between "Baby Sensory" and "CoComelon"? The only thing you share with Slim Shady is toddler-level lyrical finesse—shout out to “When Hedgehogs Kiss!" Who knew you could find so much joy in songs more suited for a giggle fest than a Grammy? If you ever drop a diss track, I fully expect it to be titled "Diapers and Rhyme" featuring a special appearance from "Baby Shark." And can we take a moment to talk about your “Most Played Songs”? I’m convinced you’re one musical phase away from getting a “Parents’ Choice Award” engraved with your name. If "Let It Go" from *Frozen* is still in your rotation, I’m worried that you might consider auditioning for a role in the next Netflix animated flick. Enjoy your crown in the kingdom of baby ballads, but remember, it’s never too late to graduate from the toddler tunes and hit the real charts—unless you're just biding time till you can take a seat in the “Throwback Thursday” genre.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!