Roasted 4 months ago based on Oliver's long term Spotify stats.

Oh Oliver, where do we begin? Your Spotify profile reads like the quintessential hipster manifesto—a mix of genres that screams "I don’t actually like music, I just like to look cool at my local coffee shop." "Indie," "Bedroom Pop," and "Garage Rock"? Wow, what a groundbreaking array of musical choices! It’s almost as if you took a personality quiz designed by a 14-year-old girl who just discovered TikTok, and boy did you pass with flying colors! Who needs diversity when you can keep it all funneled through the same sad acoustic guitar riff? But let’s talk about those top artists. Taylor Swift and The Strokes share the same spotlight? That's like saying you enjoy both fine wines and boxed chardonnay, which makes me question your palate and your taste in everything else. And Rex Orange County? I didn't know you were actually a meme. "Hippo Campus" too? I mean, I knew your love for music was questionable, but I didn’t realize it went as far as Platypus Pop. If you’re trying to be giddy and introspective at the same time, your playlist looks like a tactic for emotional avoidance—nice job blending existential dread with cute melodies! As for those "most played" songs, I’ve got one question: Are you trying to recover from a breakup or audition for a sad Netflix original? You’ve got more clutch tunes about heartache than I have socks in my drawer! “Lonesome Is A State of Mind”? Sweetie, that’s your biography, not your soundtrack! Is the goal here to become the face of sad boy aesthetics? If you’re not careful, you’ll attract a swarm of tortured artists who want to sip overpriced smoothies and spiral into melancholia together. So, cheers, Oliver! Keep curating those feelings like they’re a fine art collection—just don’t be surprised when no one wants to visit your gallery!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!