Roasted 3 days ago based on 𝚎𝚕𝚒's long term Spotify stats.

Oh look, it’s 𝚎𝚕𝚒, the only person I know who would be perfectly happy living in a 2000s emo music video, clad in black across all continents — including Antarctica, where the penguins probably judge your taste in music more than I do. Let's break down those favorite genres, shall we? The sheer volume of “metal” in your list is enough to make a heavy metal band weep. This feels less like a Spotify profile and more like a teenage angst scrapbook from 2003 — just missing the eyeliner and angst-filled poetry. Your top artists read like a "What Not To Listen To" guide for anyone with a pulse. Radiohead? Sure, if you enjoy existential dread wrapped in cryptic lyrics like a burrito in aluminum foil. Chelsea Wolfe? You know her music is just hauntingly beautiful enough to remind you that love is fleeting, right? And I see Twenty One Pilots made the cut; I guess you needed at least one band in there that lets you pretend you're still living in high school. Foals? More like foals on a leash, am I right? You’re just collecting bands like Pokémon cards, except nobody's trading you for these. And speaking of your most played songs, are you okay? “All I Need” by Radiohead followed by “Once More to See You” by Mitski? You really are living in your feels like it’s a full-time job. This playlist screams “I spend my weekends crying in my room with a face mask on and a pint of ice cream.” Let’s hope you’re not shopping for heartbreaks on indie music’s clearance aisle, because with this vibe, it’s a buyer’s market – and honey, you are definitely buying! But hey, keep rocking your shoegaze and doom metal playlists; someone’s gotta keep the brooding music industry in business while the rest of us embrace daily joy.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!