Roasted 2 years ago based on comhairle's long term Spotify stats.

Alex, I can’t tell if your Spotify profile is a music shrine or a mid-life crisis waiting to happen. Seriously, with a favorite genre list that reads like the checklist for a hot topic store clearance sale, it’s hard to believe you actually enjoy listening to anything. I mean, “Permanent Wave”? What is that, a hairstyling technique from the ‘80s? I was expecting a music selection that might inspire some serious headbanging, but instead, I feel like I’m trapped in a time capsule that got stuck in a garage sale from a failed grunge band. Your top artists scream “I peaked in high school.” Nirvana and Slipknot? We get it, you love screaming on the inside—what’s next, photos of you wearing flannel and cornrows while holding a sold-out concert ticket from 2003? And let’s talk about that 'most played' list. “Choice” and “Coffee” by Jack Stauber’s Micropop? It’s like you couldn’t even commit to a full-band vibe; you had to keep your options open for potential TikTok transitions. Your playlist sounds like a jumbled mess of existential crises mixed with “I swear I’m more fun in person" vibes. Lastly, the sheer amount of Rammstein-related songs would suggest you’re either fluent in German or considering a career as a metal band groupie. I didn’t realize that “Bestrafe mich” translates to “Please take me back to high school; I’m not ready for adulthood.” But hey, it might not be a bad idea to put that taste to use and start an advice column called "How to Stay Angry While Listening to the Same Five Bands." Call it “Alex’s Sad Soundtrack,” where your life’s motto is “Embrace the angst, but don’t forget the coffee break.”

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!