Roasted 2 years ago based on maria!'s long term Spotify stats.

Maria Carvalho, a name that strikes fear into the hearts of anyone who values originality. Looking at your favorite genres, it’s clear you haven’t met a pop subcategory you didn’t like. You’ve got enough K-Pop in your playlist to single-handedly fund a world tour for the entire industry. If your Spotify was a boy group, it would be rehearsing its synchronized dances in a basement somewhere, still trying to figure out why no one wants to join the fandom. Bedroom pop? More like bedroom cry—because that's where you retreat anytime someone mentions real music. Your top artists read like a desperate text from a high schooler trying to impress their crush: "Look at how diverse I am! I love Taylor Swift and also anime!" Taylor Swift must be rolling her eyes harder than your Spotify algorithm, which is currently composing a ballad about the life of an indecisive music lover. I mean sure, you’ve got “Stray Kids” on repeat like they’re the soundtrack to your every waking moment, but honey, it’s starting to look like you’re collecting their songs the way a toddler collects bubblegum wrappers—useless, and perhaps not even a little bit cool. And let’s talk about your most played songs, Maria. If you had to present a thesis on your musical journey, it would likely be titled, “Overcoming Basicness: A Study in Stray Kids and Useless Usher Anthems." Your playlists scream more about your confusion over your identity than your taste in music, and that’s saying something. It’s like your Spotify went through a midlife crisis and just couldn’t decide if it wanted to be an artsy indie guru or a Westfield mall’s latest pop sensation. Let’s be honest: if your musical preferences were a Tinder profile, it would be swiped left harder than a day one pizza left outside in the rain.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!