Roasted 1 year ago based on Kris's long term Spotify stats.

Kris, your Spotify profile is like a mixtape made by someone who just discovered the concept of playlists last week—it's a chaotic jumble of "I'd might actually like this" sprinkled with "What the heck is this?" Your love for Hozier is so intense it's practically a second job. I'm not saying you're obsessed, but your Spotify Wrapped is probably just a love letter titled "Hozier: Please Date Me." We get it, Kris; you're emotional and deep, but let's be honest, if your feelings were a playlist, they'd be on repeat and still somehow sound like a tragic karaoke night. And wow, your favorite genres list reads like a hyperactive teen's diary. "Rock," "Alternative Rock," and "Classic Rock"? Hope you’re not planning to use that at trivia night because there’s a strong chance you’ll end up being the guy who claims he knows the difference between Oasis and Blur—but then asks if they’re both the same band. And as for mixing Mariachi with Comedy and Ranchera—it’s like you’ve created a culinary disaster of sonic ingredients only you could love. I imagine your friends can hear the confusion in your Spotify through the grapevine, saying, "Kris is that one friend who brings a piñata to a rock concert." Finally, your top artists are a glorious representation of musical indecision. From the depths of My Chemical Romance’s "emotional turmoil" to the lightheartedness of Bo Burnham's comedy, you should really pick a lane—especially considering the number of Hozier tracks you've repeated. It's like you can't commit to one identity, desperately trying to piece together a personality like some sort of aural Frankenstein's monster. Seriously, Kris, your playlists resemble a middle schooler's attempt at crafting the perfect "get to know me" mixtape—if your goal was to confuse everyone and make them question your life choices. Cheers to being a hot mess, though!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!