Roasted 1 year ago based on Noah Johnson's long term Spotify stats.

Noah Johnson, huh? You wanna talk about musical choices? Your playlist is Halloween all year round, and I’m not talking about the spooky kind. With genres like Emo Rap and Punk Rap dancing hand-in-hand with Glitch, it’s clear that your taste in music is as confused as a cat in a dog park. Rage Rap? I get it, it's your way of preparing for life’s disappointments. But with your particular blend of genres, it's no wonder you’re single—you're too busy vibing with your emotional distress to realize the closest thing you have to a partner is an overused pair of headphones and a Spotify subscription that should come with a side of therapy. Top artists? More like a list of who to avoid at all costs. Drake? Sure, he’s got the smooth jams, but that’s only if you want to listen to a guy cry about his love life while you drown your sorrows in microwave pizza rolls. And wait, “Destroy Lonely”? With that name, I thought you were trying to summon a middle school emo phase. Don't even get me started on the fact that "Lil Uzi Vert" is more like "Lil Washed Up," given the choice of artists you seem to think make up for a lack of anything substantial in your life. How about trying to find some diversity? Or is that too “glitch” for your chaotic way of life? And your most played songs have names that sound like the random words I threw into a hashtag generator. "Figure It Out"? Well, I have a suggestion: figure out how to stop listening to “5!RE” and channel some of that rage into something productive—like taking a shower and doing your laundry more than once a month. You’ve got a top ten that reads like a bad knock-off of a SoundCloud playlist, and I have to wonder if you’re just auditioning for a role in “Dude, Where’s My Car?” because the only thing you’re driving home is how deep your denial really goes. Keep spinning those tracks, Noah, but do us all a favor and add a little sunshine alongside that existential dread every now and then.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!