Roasted 6 months ago based on .jar's long term Spotify stats.

Hey pj, your Spotify profile reads like a goth kid's shopping list from a thrift store, and I can’t tell if that’s a compliment or just sad. Your favorite genres sound like a playlist for a funeral at a haunted house. Seriously, who hurt you? Did you get dumped during a heavy rainstorm while listening to "Boys Don't Cry"? It seems like your vibe is all about hanging out in the shadows with a sad expression and discussing the merits of "deathrock" with ghosts. Newsflash: it’s 2023, and life is too short to blend into the wallpaper of a 1980s horror flick. And let’s talk about your top artists. With a lineup that could be the soundtrack to a mood ring, it's clear that you're a walking, breathing punchline of pretentiousness. “Siouxsie and the Banshees” to “Frank Sinatra”? What are you trying to accomplish here—confuse people into thinking you’re an avant-garde music curator when you're probably sitting alone in your room rewatching "The Craft"? Your playlists are the audio equivalent of “please no one actually check on me, I'm totally fine... just vibing.” Those most played songs scream “I’m a misunderstood artist” right before they awkwardly trip on their oversized combat boots. “You're Dead” by Norma Tanega? Wow, how original, pj. Nothing says "I have interests" like reveling in macabre sweetness while also throwing in a dose of "how soon is now?" as if your existential crisis needs a catchy soundtrack. Maybe you should consider a change; perhaps something upbeat, like “Living My Best Life,” because the only thing darker than your Spotify history is your outlook on fun.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!