Roasted 6 months ago based on Mark's long term Spotify stats.

Mark, your Spotify profile is like a high school emo kid's diary exploded all over the internet. Seriously, with a favorite genre list that reads like a metal festival line-up on repeat, it's a wonder you've managed to avoid the label of a "perpetual sad boy." Let’s face it—your playlist could be a soundtrack for a therapy session where the therapist just shakes their head in disbelief and passes the tissues. “Alternative Metal” may be your favorite genre, but judging by your top artists, it sounds like you’re stuck in a 2004 Hot Topic time capsule. Top artists like Linkin Park, Korn, and Metallica? No shock here, Mark. Your taste screams “My parents didn’t understand me.” But let’s not gloss over the fact that you’ll rock out to “FCKED” like it's the anthem of your life. Newsflash: it’s okay to let go of the angst and get a sense of humor, because at this rate, the only thing getting “FCKED” is your social life. The only metal breaking through is this heavy layer of unintentional irony. When was the last time you blasted a tune with a positive vibe? Your morning routine must consist of arranging your collection of black band tees and contemplating the futility of existence. And “Imagine Dragons”? Really? You’re in a metal graveyard and decide to dig up that generic pop-rock zombie? It’s like getting a salad at a steakhouse: just embarrassing. With repeats of “Rotting In Vain,” I’m concerned you might actually become a social experiment in how far one can delve into melodrama. If your most played songs were a sad movie, they’d be titled "Mark: A Life of Regret." But hey, if leaning into adolescent nihilism makes you happy, I wish you the best in your quest for the perfect mosh pit—preferably one where you can also find your sense of humor again!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!