Roasted 2 months ago based on Lance Linde's long term Spotify stats.

Lance Linde, huh? With a Spotify profile that reads like a youth pastor's midlife crisis playlist, it’s no wonder you’re single. Your favorite genres could use a warning label: "Caution! May cause severe eye-rolling among anyone who’s not secretly praying for a miracle." You’ve carved a niche in the middle of parishioner rock ‘n’ roll and a hip hop deity only to realize, oops, you’re two rungs above Sunday school karaoke. The only thing lamer than your genre mix is your desperate need for divine intervention in curating your jams. Your top artists could also use an exorcism of taste. I mean, seriously, "Christian Hip Hop" and "Guns N' Roses" in the same breath? That's like pairing holy water with whiskey and expecting a miracle at the bottom of the bottle. It’s impressive how you've somehow managed to gather enough musical whiplash from the Foo Fighters and NF while trying to keep your soul in check. Tell me, do you spin around in circles at church while blasting "Classic Rock" to feel rebellious? Spoiler: you’re not that edgy - even "Maroon 5" must be shaking their heads in disappointment. And those most played songs are a tragic comedy unfolding before our eyes. Your playlist screams “my Spotify is sponsored by a mid-afternoon identity crisis!” Two words: voice recognition. You could've done better selecting tracks by letting somebody else randomly hit play on a jukebox—preferably one that only plays elevator music. At this rate, you’d still manage to confuse the lyrics of "Godzilla" with a Sunday sermon. Just remember, Lance, your taste is a bit like your faith: a mixed bag of enthusiasm, but let’s be real, it could use some serious redemption.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!