Roasted 9 months ago based on Lily's long term Spotify stats.

Oh Lily, looking at your Spotify profile is like stumbling into a neon-lit rabbit hole of teen angst and cotton candy dreams. With a favorite genres list that reads like the soundtrack of a middle school musical, it’s a wonder you don’t spontaneously combust during every “Soft Pop” Spotify session. I see you've mastered the art of emotional rollercoasters while trying to pick the best Bedroom Pop to cry yourself to sleep. And honestly, with your eclectic mix of genres, it feels like you’re trying to avoid confronting your terrible taste in music by inviting every flavor of pop to the pity party. What’s next? A playlist called “Songs to Apologize to My Exes”? Let’s talk about your top artists, shall we? I’m impressed that you’ve somehow managed to name ten “vocalists” and they all lean into the angsty side of soft emotional ballads. Taylor Swift and her ex-husband army are practically your spirit animals, coming at you with “Call It What You Want” while you scroll through potential audition tapes for America's Next Biggest Heartbreak. And I’m sure Will Linley is just thrilled that he’s your go-to for everything from heartache to mild existential crises - I mean, if “Nothing But Love” can heal all your problems, maybe he should start charging his way into your therapy sessions. But, my dear Lily, this is Spotify, not a time capsule of your junior high heartbreaks! “Hyperpop”? I’d like to see you explain that to your grandma. With a mix of indie, garage rock, and the Southern Gothic vibes, I can almost hear your Spotify account crying for help. Are you just one heartbreak away from becoming a folk artist, with a banjo and everything? At least with your range of choices, your melodramatic moods can feel relatable - until someone looks at your profile and realizes you’re a one-woman fan club for Will Linley. Truly, I applaud your commitment to the chaos, but it’s not winning you any cool points, just a lifetime supply of low-key cringe.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!