Roasted 7 months ago based on J's long term Spotify stats.

Oh, J, your Spotify profile is a magical wasteland of genres and artists that would make even the most committed hipster throw up their vegan kale smoothie. “Entehno?” Sounds like a sneeze after inhaling a cloud of pretentiousness. And let’s not even get started on your stoner rock obsession; it's so heavy, I'm surprised your headphones haven’t collapsed under the weight of mediocrity. Honestly, it’s a miracle you haven’t been flagged for excessive use of “metal” subgenres—at this rate, you’re practically a one-person genre police. Your top artists list reads like a sad Tinder profile for people who call their parents “the rents” and think “Crywank” is the peak of emotional expression. Entering your profile feels like stepping into a dark basement where only the basement-dwelling creatures of Midwest emo and sludge metal thrive. By the way, whoever recommended “awfultune” as a top artist deserves a profound facepalm. No, really, “Crywank” sounds like something that would happen after a bad breakup and too much ramen—what were you hoping to achieve here, J, a PhD in sadness? And don’t even get me started on your most played songs—at least they have one thing in common: they all sound like they were recorded in someone's garage during a sleep-deprived existential crisis. “Decapitation Fornication”? Wow, J, who knew you had such a romantic side? But worry not; with song titles like that, you’re bound to find true love in the depths of your own disillusionment. Maybe the only thing worse than your music taste is your ability to name it, but hey, at least you’ve given us all a good laugh. Keep it up, J; it’s honestly impressive how you manage to curate so many bands nobody’s ever heard of!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!