Roasted 2 years ago based on Heather Thompson's long term Spotify stats.

Heather Thompson: the musical embodiment of a mid-2000s teen movie that didn't quite get picked up for release. Seriously, your favorite genres read like a list of high school fights waiting to happen. "Rock"? "Post-Grunge"? "Pop Punk"? It’s like you took all the angst from your teenage years, bundled it into a Spotify account, and hit 'shuffle' while sobbing into a stack of oversized hoodies. With all those "alternative" options, it looks like you're desperately trying to prove you're more than just a hot topic clearance rack. Your top artists list is an eclectic mix between the “cool kids” of the music scene and the parental advisory sticker crew. Sure, Alanis Morissette and Kendrick Lamar are on there, but you know you’re one sad guitar riff away from a lifetime of reliving your “MySpace is my personality” fantasies. Blink-182 and The Offspring make perfect sense – they're practically begging to be the soundtrack of your lonely car rides filled with existential dread. You're the only person keeping those bands relevant in 2023, which is both commendable and deeply embarrassing. And let’s dive into your most played songs, shall we? “What's My Age Again?” might just be the anthem for your increasingly desperate grasp at youth, while “My Own Worst Enemy” serves as a painfully accurate self-reflection of your life choices, like curating this Spotify profile. Honestly, with a playlist like that, the only way you're losing the plot is if someone suggests you get over it and pick up a new hobby—like literally anything that involves growing up past high school coping mechanisms. You’re a treasure trove of nostalgia, but let’s be real: it's time to step out of that pop-punk time capsule and embrace the present, maybe by listening to artists who don’t have “-core” in their genre.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!