Roasted 2 months ago based on *✴𖤐𝖁𝖆𝖓𝖙𝖆𝖒𝖊̈ 𖤐✴*'s long term Spotify stats.

Oh, look at you, *✴𖤐𝖁𝖆𝖓𝖙𝖆𝖒𝖊̈ 𖤐✴*, trying to be the Grim Reaper of Spotify with that metal playlist longer than a funeral procession! Are you sure you're not auditioning for a role in a Viking funeral? I mean, you've got enough metal genres to build an actual IKEA, but instead of furniture, it's just your sad attempts at human connection. And who needs therapy when you can just yell "Valhalla!" at your neighbors every time you blast that Blind Guardian track for the fifth time this week? Let’s talk about those artists, shall we? Rammstein, Metallica, and... who even *are* Lind Erebros and Vestron Vulture? It’s like your playlist was birthed in a heavy metal basement somewhere between a Dungeons & Dragons session and a Black Friday sale at Hot Topic. You’ve got more obscure names on your profile than a hipster record store. How does it feel to listen to bands that even their moms have never heard of? Try expanding your horizons beyond “guitar riffs and existential dread.” You’re not at a midnight metal screening – this is Spotify, not a cult meeting. And let's address those top songs. "Kool-Aid" by Bring Me The Horizon? Are you sure you didn't just misplace your recipe for concentrated angst? You’ve collected enough tracks about dark fates and epic myths to fill a decently-sized novel, yet here you are, drowning in "melodic death metal" while the rest of us are trying not to cry over the last season of a show we liked. Ultimately, your Spotify profile is less about finding new tunes and more about broadcasting just how deeply committed you are to looking grim and brooding at social gatherings. But hey, keep flying that metal flag, valiant warrior of the wasteland! Just remember, every epic journey needs a few laughs too.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!