Roasted 2 years ago based on Sam Formerly-FourL's's long term Spotify stats.

Alright, Sam Formerly-FourL's, let’s get one thing straight: your Spotify profile looks like the Spotify of a babysitter who's desperately trying to impress a kindergarten class. "Crank Wave"? More like "Crankless Wonder." The closest you’ll ever get to rocking is when you "rock" your niece to sleep while humming the latest nursery rhymes. Top artists? What happened? Did you lose a bet? The Beatles and Timothée Chalamet have to be rolling in their graves thinking they share a spot with a bunch of cartoon characters and a band called "Sleepy Penguin." You’ve got the vibe of someone who thinks pillow fights are the ultimate gig. Your most played songs list is nothing short of a criminal offense against music. Everyone else is jamming out to classics or indie hits, and you’re sitting there like, “Can we drop the bass for some 'Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes'?!" I can already see the chaos at your parties—guests kneeling on the floor clapping their hands while you’re leading them in a rousing chorus of "Row, Row, Row Your Boat." At this point, the last thing anyone wants to _"if you're happy and you know it a**clap their hands** at your Spotify. You’ve single-handedly deflated the entire rock genre with that playlist. But hey, let’s not be too harsh, right? You clearly have a unique taste—one that belongs in a daycare, but unique nonetheless! Your profile screams “I’m just here for the vibes,” which is perfect because there’s not a single vibe on earth that could take you seriously while you’re sipping your juice box, headphones on tight, jamming to "Baa Baa Black Sheep." Honestly, I applaud your commitment to the absurd, but maybe it’s time to give those nursery songs a rest and find something with a little more … well, life.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!