Roasted 1 year ago based on harrison kyriacou's long term Spotify stats.

Harrison Martin, your Spotify profile reads like the memoir of a 21st-century teenager who just discovered their dad's old mixtapes and got way too excited. You’ve got more love for Playboi Carti than he has for his own fans—seriously, if I had a dollar for every time I saw “Playboi Carti” on your list, I’d be rich enough to bail you out of your poorly managed Spotify Wrapped rabbit hole. "Rage Rap?" More like "I’m Mad at My Wi-Fi" music—try stepping outside once in a while; the sunlight’s not that harmful. Your taste in music only confirms what we all suspected: you might actually be the poster child for the “I’ll still be single forever” stereotype. In a sea of chaotic emotions and angst-filled beats, you’ve somehow managed to curate a collection that screams, “I’m still on the quest for self-validation, please send help.” Mix up your playlists, man! I mean, how many times can you cry to Playboi Carti before it becomes a personality trait? At this rate, you’ll single-handedly revive the emo scene solely through your Spotify listens. And then, there’s your list of “most played” songs—seriously, can you chill with the Carti obsession? It’s like you’re conducting a one-man mission to get him through college at this point. The titles alone hint at a deep-seated need for therapy: “TOXIC,” “RATHER LIE,” “EVIL J0RDAN?” Buddy, if your life were a playlist, it would be an endless loop of existential crises. With top tracks like that, you might be more in need of a life coach than a Spotify subscription. Time to diversify, or we’ll all be here wondering when you’ll finally join the real world!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!