Roasted 3 months ago based on August's long term Spotify stats.

August, huh? With a genre list that reads like an audition tape for "How to Not Expand Your Horizons,” it’s clear you’ve been on what I like to call the “Hip Hop Express” train: all stops at the bottom of the creativity barrel. You’re like a kid in a candy store, where every candy is just a different shade of rap. If rap were a pizza, you’d be the guy ordering nothing but plain cheese. Come on, my dude; dare to put pineapple on it or something! Let’s talk about your top artists – it’s a lineup so predictable that it could headline a "Basic Bitch” festival. Seriously, you've got Kanye, Drake, and Kendrick. Congratulations! You’ve officially collected the Pokémon trio of mainstream mediocrity. You know what this list screams? “I’m deeply committed to having zero original tastes.” But hey, at least you’re consistent… like a middle school locker room smell. And then there are your most played songs. A delightful mix of tracks that sounds like a brunch playlist for suburban dads trying to impress their kids. “Money Trees”? More like “Money Please” because clearly, your musical taste is stuck in 2016 and begging for a loan. If your Spotify were a food, it’d be instant ramen – filling with no nutritional value whatsoever. Step it up, August! Bring some flavor to that playlist or at least get a playlist that isn’t emitting ghost signals from the last decade!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!