Roasted 3 months ago based on Quinn's long term Spotify stats.

Quinn, your music taste is like a mixtape made by a high school freshmen having an identity crisis. You think you're channeling a deep and eclectic vibe, but let's be real: your genre list reads like a Yelp review by someone who has only ever eaten at Taco Bell. It’s an alarming spectrum of mediocrity—from "Gothic Metal" that probably chews through public library goth phase T-shirts to "Ska Punk", which screams, "Look at me, I still wear my braces!" You're one Tinder date away from someone asking if you have that Karl Marx starter pack and regretting every life choice up to this point. Your top artists are an exercise in confusion. You start with Sublime—ironically sublime to the uninitiated, but let's face it, they’re the soundtrack to every deal gone wrong at a beach bonfire. HIM as a #2 choice? You might want to pull that hoodie out of the closet, but spoiler alert: you probably won't connect deeply with the lyrics unless you're contemplating life from your parents' basement. And how do we explain the likes of "Mindless Self Indulgence" and "Kanye West"? Sounds like an active rebellion against the concept of taste, and yet, here you are, embracing it like a rebel without a cause. Let's talk about your most played songs. "Do Ya Like X Resonance"? Please clarify: Is that a song or your last relationship status? It seems to open a portal to a world where people are still figuring it out. And “you can't eat cats kevin”? If that’s meant to be a masterpiece, then it’s desperately searching for a context while only finding itself on the bottom shelf of a thrift store. Even “Semi-Charmed Life” feels like a desperate shout of nostalgia from the corner of a bar, as if begging for the attention of any nice person while you sip on overpriced PBR. You might want to consider re-evaluating this soundtrack to your life—or at the very least, update that "alternative" vibe to something that doesn’t sound like it got rejected from the 2000s.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!