Roasted 6 days ago based on William's long term Spotify stats.

William, your Spotify profile reads like the eclectic quarterly review of a hipster commune that’s trying a little too hard to be edgy. “Southern Gothic” mixed with “Electro Swing” is a combo only a tortured artist or a person with questionable life choices could conjure. Let’s be real; the only time you should be listening to this concoction is when you’re deep in a midlife crisis, and even then, it’s not a good excuse for your Spotify Wrapped. You’re basically a walking advertisement for why some people should stick to top 40 hits. Your top artists list is a shocker too. "Will Wood and the Tapeworms" sounds like the name of an underground support group for people who really wish they didn’t ask their friends for music recommendations ever. Seriously, do you have a Spotify contract that demands an odd number of words in every artist's name? And “Shayfer James”? You couldn’t have picked anyone with a recognizable name? At this rate, the biggest hit anyone will know from your list is the click of someone swiftly unfollowing you after peeking at your playlists. But I must commend you for your most played songs—it’s a real treasure trove of confusion! "Mr. Capgras Encounters a Secondhand Vanity: Tulpamancer's Prosopagnosia / Pareidolia (As Direct Result of Trauma to Fusiform Gyrus)"? That's not just a song; it’s a graduate thesis waiting to happen. And don’t get me started on “Hand Me My Shovel, I’m Going In!” What’s next, a track about gardening? Let's hope your playlist can dig you out of the social pit you’ve leaped into! At this point, your only saving grace is the hope that someone finds you ironically cool while the rest of us just cringe in confusion.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!