Roasted 3 months ago based on Robin Goodfellow's long term Spotify stats.

Oh Robin Goodfellow, you sweet summer child, your Spotify profile is like a Pinterest board of indie musicians and feelings no one asked for. With a “Favorite genres” list that reads like a hipster’s grocery list - “Art Pop,” “Chanson,” and “Variété Française?” If I wanted to hear more pretentious ambiguity, I’d just eavesdrop on conversations at a vegan café. Were you stuck in a coffee shop’s soundtrack for all of quarantine? Why does your palette of sounds resemble an emotional support blanket for art school dropouts? And your top artists—bless your heart. You’re basically one plaid shirt away from becoming a walking Urban Outfitters advertisement. You’ve got Charli XCX and Taylor Swift in the same breath, which is like saying “I love fire and water equally!” David Bowie is a legend, but have you consulted any of his music’s lyrics, or are we just satisfied with being 'slightly sad’ on repeat? Meanwhile, the most played songs list reads like a "How to Cry in Public" playlist, complete with tracks titled like the answers to questions no one asked. And is “So Hot You’re Hurting My Feelings” your life motto? Because honestly, at this point, it’s hard to tell if it’s your theme song or an invitation to class action. Let’s talk about those most played tracks, Robin. You’ve officially surpassed casual listener and entered best friend territory—with all the support of a therapist. “Touching Yourself” by The Japanese House? Please tell me that’s just a cry for help and not your go-to self-care anthem. If your Spotify profile had a Tinder bio, it'd probably read, “Looking for meaningful connections over discussions about fleeting trends and existential dread.” Just remember, Robin: your musical taste is an exhibition on how to get arrested by your own emotions—so lace up those converses and ride that fine line between artistry and utter confusion!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!