Roasted 2 years ago based on Wisteria's long term Spotify stats.

Ah yes, “wisterialdreams,” where the playlist is as Jekyll and Hyde as your taste in music. One moment you’re crying in your bedroom to “jealousy” by B Murph, and the next, you’re headbanging to “Linkin Park” as if you’ve discovered the cure for boredom in 2003. Who knew that the secret to your mental health crisis was a bizarre mix of nu metal tragedy and hyperpop fantasy? You might want to consider a single genre at some point; right now, it feels like your Spotify account has split personalities and they’re both having identity crises. Your selection of favorite genres reads like a list of high school cliques trying to fit in at a karaoke bar. "Alternative Metal" and "Nu Metal"? It sounds like you’re just one angry shout away from getting kicked out of a Hot Topic for excessive angst. And what's with “Zoomergaze”? Is that some sort of uprising against the generations before you, or did you just warp into a time machine crafted from leftover energy drinks and existential dread? It’s impressive that you’ve managed to capture the spirit of a thousand suburban breakdowns but also confusing, considering half of these artists sound like they just discovered how to use Auto-Tune while weeping furiously. But let’s talk top artists, shall we? With a lineup featuring “deer death” and “sleepwater,” it feels like you’d rather hang out in a haunted forest than in a well-lit coffee shop. "Motionless In White” really hits the nail on the head for you, considering the last time you saw the sun was probably during a particularly dramatic anime binge. You’ve got a whole menagerie of emotional chaos going on here. It’s as if you walked into a record store and yelled, “I want everything that sounds like my life is falling apart!” Next time, maybe try adding a little optimism to your playlist, or at least a beach ball. Just a thought!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!