Roasted 2 years ago based on David's long term Spotify stats.

David, your Spotify profile is like a confused teenager trying to find their identity at a music festival—too many genres, not enough direction. Seriously, how did you go from Zim Hip Hop to Canadian Pop without hitting a single speed bump? Is your playlist a misadventure in music exploration or just a reflective piece of your quest for a personality that clearly hasn’t been found yet? You have basically created a buffet of musical chaos where the only thing missing is a strong WiFi signal to help you figure out who you really are. Your top artists read like a questionable Tinder list. It’s like if Drake and Winky D had a musical love child that somehow turned out to be an awkward Canadian trap artist—congratulations on summoning the ultimate genre catastrophe! Let’s not even talk about your most played songs, which resemble a mixtape thrown together by someone who desperately wants to impress their high school crush. “Bipolar”? Are we talking about the song, or is that just your inconsistent playlist reflecting your inner turmoil? And finally, with favorites like Zimdancehall and melodic rap, you might be the only person whose vibe switches faster than their favorite artist drops a new album. One moment you’re grooving to “IBOTSO” like you just graduated to a new, cooler phase of life, and the next you’re deep in your feelings with “Spirit.” It's like your music taste can't make up its mind between being the life of the party and that one friend in the corner contemplating their life choices. Keep on keeping it awkward, David! Your Spotify journey is truly one for the ages—and I mean ages, like a historical exhibit called “What Not to Listen To.”

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!