Roasted 2 years ago based on NoturSpotify's long term Spotify stats.

NoturSpotify, where your taste in music screams, "I peaked in high school!" Your favorite genres read like a BuzzFeed quiz titled, “Which basic white girl are you?” Congratulations on your ability to create a playlist that perfectly captures the sounds of a middle-class suburban living room—it's like a soundtrack to your overly fluorescent lifestyle. I mean, who needs variety when you can stick to pop, rock, and the sophisticated allure of electro swing? Because nothing says “I have depth” like mixing Eminem with Michael Bublé while dancing like no one is watching but praying someone always does. Your top artists present a truly compelling case for the music preferences of someone who lives off cold brew coffee and artisan avocado toast. AJR and TheFatRat? If they ever set foot in a music festival, I can assure you, they’d be getting served their lattes with a side of pity. And then there’s Green Day and Andy Grammer—every cool kid’s guilty pleasure, followed by groans and an eye-roll from actual music lovers. Is your Spotify account sponsored by parental skip days and cringeworthy TikTok challenges? Because I can’t think of a better soundtrack to your life of regrettable decisions and endless cringe. Let’s talk about your most played songs, which I’m convinced was pieced together during a therapy session that focused on denial. "Inertia"? More like “Inertia of Flavor!” I’m just glad you didn’t include a track titled, “Why Am I Like This?” But don’t worry, buddy, all 7 AJR tracks will drown out the sound of your future lonely nights. You’ve taken the art of mixing playlists to dizzying new heights, and by heights, I mean the dumpster fire behind a seedy bar where sad karaoke nights take place. So keep streaming, NoturSpotify. No one’s judging—well, maybe just me—but who needs self-esteem when you’ve got “Dance Pop” to keep you company?

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!