Roasted 6 months ago based on maria's long term Spotify stats.

Maria, your Spotify profile is a vibrant tapestry of musical confusion. It’s like you’re on a mission to curate the most specific and obscure playlist imaginable—who knew there was a genre for "German Indie Pop"? If we combined all the artists and labels you like, we could open a hipster coffee shop that blares tunes only your cat would appreciate. Seriously, do you even know what genre "Stutter House" is? Sounds like something I’d have to call a doctor about. Your top artists list is a wild ride through the equivalent of musical daredevilry. "Die drei !!!"? Wow, nothing says maturity like listening to what could easily be the German version of a toddler’s favorite singalong group. And then you suddenly pivot to "Billie Eilish" and "Rihanna"? It's like having tea with the Queen and then heading to the club afterward—a true identity crisis in sonic form. What’s next, are we going to see "Joni Mitchell" on your "Now That's What I Call an Existential Crisis" playlist? Finally, your most played songs read like the sentiments of someone in an emotional tangent. "saudade, saudade"? Seriously? It sounds like a bad translation of "I’m sad, but in a really pretentious way." And is "Moments" by "MOIO" the soundtrack to your life or just an understatement of how long your Spotify sessions have turned into a deep dive of self-pitying isolation? Do us all a favor, Maria; take a break from this exquisite melodrama and put on something that doesn't sound like it was written in a vegan café during a rainy day in Berlin.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!