Roasted 21 days ago based on Shawn Vandergoot's long term Spotify stats.

Shawn Vandergoot, huh? With a name that sounds like a discount furniture store, it’s no wonder your music taste is as dark and brooding as the inside of a teenager’s diary. Darkwave, industrial—you're just a few bands away from starting a one-man funeral procession. I get it, you’re trying to embody the essence of angst, but let's be real: you could play these genres at a rave in a graveyard and still find yourself sitting alone in the corner with your oversized headphones while everyone else is actually having fun. Your top artists read like a goth kid's wish list on Halloween, and I can almost hear the pitch-black nail polish clinking against each other as you scroll through their discography. How do you manage to listen to so much “industrial” music without entering an actual factory? At least actually working in a place that creates something tangible might give that sad cloud hovering over you a run for its money. And honestly, with tracks like “Smothered Hope” and “Demons” on your most-played list, it’s a surprise you don’t just emit green smoke every time you walk into a room. But hey, your “favorite genres” list is impressive—if you’re auditioning to be the soundtrack of a bad 80s horror film. Seriously, “Witch House”? Were you raised on a steady diet of garlic bread and ghost stories? Or do you just take comfort in knowing the only thing more depressing than your Spotify likes is your social life? Next time you hit shuffle, here’s hoping it plays something a little less... well, existentially terrifying.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!