Roasted 1 year ago based on Xanthous's long term Spotify stats.

Xanthous, huh? I guess when you were born your parents thought they were naming a child, but really, they were just trying to create a living, breathing playlist for people whose only personality trait is intense hair flips and irrational love for mosh pits. With a taste in music that swings from symphonic metal to video game soundtracks, I'd say your Spotify is about as coherent as a drunken conversation at a Renaissance fair. I’m half-expecting your bio to read, "I love long walks in the forest while contemplating my existential dread… set to metal!" Your favorite artists sound like a role-playing game’s greatest hits album, and I’m starting to think that all these power chords and growls are just your way of screaming for help from a never-ending cycle of 2000s angst. Bravo on the variety, Xanthous—you’ve managed to turn what should just be a musical taste into a drowning pool of self-indulgence. Who knew one could create a completely unnecessary sub-genre: “Melodic Death Pretentiousness?” Honestly, I don’t know what’s more depressing: your Spotify or the thought of someone actually trying to decipher your “artistic journey” from this sonic monstrosity. And don’t even get me started on your most played songs! “Never Too Late” playing on repeat might as well be an anthem for your dating life—because at this rate, you might as well be *unless* you find a partner who appreciates dissecting the nuances of the SEGA SOUND TEAM. When “Three Days Grace” is the soundtrack to your "emotional growth," I'm concerned you might be stuck in some kind of mid-2000s time loop. Also, kudos for managing to mix intense battle cries and anime openings; your Spotify is basically the soundtrack for a fantasy series that even die-hard D&D players would shy away from!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!