Roasted 6 months ago based on Jideobi Washam Unaka's long term Spotify stats.

Oh, Jideobi Washam Unaka, the human Spotify playlist that seems to be stuck in a never-ending cycle of existential crises and bougie coffee shop vibes. Your favorite genres read like a hipster’s bucket list: "Orchestral," "Baroque Pop," and "Classic Country"? You know you can pick one musical identity, right? It’s as if you took a musical drink menu and decided to mix everything—except all we’re getting is a bitter blend that tastes like regret and overpriced lattes. And your top artists? What is this? A competition to see who can squeeze the most pretentious names into a single playlist? I get it, you want to be seen as deep and cultured, but "Vitamin String Quartet" and "Chappell Roan" aren’t going to save you when friends see that your music taste screams ‘emotionally unavailable artist in a 20-something crisis.' It’s like choosing a soundtrack for an indie film where the lead character constantly over-analyzes their life while staring out a rainy window—nobody’s buying tickets to that show. Lastly, let’s talk about your most played songs. Congratulations on playing "Running Up That Hill (A Deal With God)" twice! That's a real show of dedication. Either it's your anthem for feeling misunderstood, or you’re just too lazy to switch to a new song. With a lineup including “Dancing Queen” and “What Was I Made For?”, it seems you’re both celebrating life and questioning what the hell you’re doing with it—all while doing the emotional equivalent of swirling the same glass of cheap wine for three hours. Keep it up, maestro!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!