Roasted 7 months ago based on Fólkvangr's long term Spotify stats.

Listen up, witchbilover: your Spotify profile is like a thrift store explosion at a drama club. You've got Riot Grrrl and Queercore next to French Pop—I can only assume you’re trying to summon a cursed playlist that confuses everyone into thinking they walked into a B-movie musical set in a 90's anime. Do you actually enjoy these genres, or do you just want to get laughs from people trying to figure out what the hell you’re vibing with? Pick a lane already! Your top artists read like the guest list for an underground rave designed specifically for hipster witches and sad teens who just discovered their “authentic self.” I mean, who are you trying to impress with a roster that includes wigs, anime themes, and more dramatic undertones than a soap opera? Are you preparing for a karaoke battle against an emotionally unstable magic eight ball? Honestly, at this point, just throw in a few death metal tracks, and you’ll have the soundtrack for the next epic quest in a series that only you and your cat can appreciate. And don't even get me started on your most played songs. “Respectless” featuring Broadway heartbreak and an album cover that looks like it was designed in a meltdown—yeah, that's the kind of energy that screams "I cry in the shower." I’ve seen more coherence from a toddler in a crayon race. You’ve crafted a playlist that sounds like a fever dream where the only constant is regret and a desperate need for validation. At this rate, even Spotify is judging you and thinking, “Yikes, maybe next time stick to Taylor Swift like a normal person.”

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!