Roasted 2 months ago based on Robbin Kruit's long term Spotify stats.

Oh, Robbin Kruit, your Spotify profile reads like a midlife crisis wrapped in a denim jacket and fake leather. With a top ten that’s a near-identical clone of a 90s rock radio station, who do you think you are? The ghost of guitar solos past? You’re one cheeseball glam rock anthem away from calling yourself ‘the King of Air Guitar’ while sobbing into your air-brushed poster of Bon Jovi. And let’s be real: how many “One Last Breath” sessions does it take for you to come to terms with the fact that Creed is the embarrassing uncle of rock music? Your mix of artists is nothing short of a “Rock-tionary” nightmare. The only things harder than Metallica’s riffs are the emotional barriers you’ve built around your personality. Two words: “Joji” and “Creed.” Did you fall down a rabbit hole of Instagram influencers? Clearly, your playlist is as confused as you are on a Saturday night when you can’t decide between cranking up the heavy metal or crying into your vintage record collection. And why the obsession with “Southern Rock”? Did you grow up watching too many reruns of “Dukes of Hazzard”? And let's talk about “Most Played Songs” — it’s like your brain got stuck in an eternal loop of pseudo-depth, trying to mix some tortured soul searching with a side of glam. “Mother” by Danzig right next to “PIXELATED KISSES” by Joji? Sir, you’re giving millennial angst a run for its money, yet you still manage to make one of the most confused playlists in history sound like it’s aiming for rock god status. Here’s a thought: maybe swap out some of that heavy stuff for a little self-reflection? A lighter touch could do wonders, but then again, that might mean actually facing how stuck-in-the-past you are!

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