Roasted 1 year ago based on cal ☆彡's long term Spotify stats.

Oh cal 🤍, with a Spotify profile this eclectic and confused, it’s like you took a music quiz blindfolded and just scribbled whatever came to mind. "Indie," "Pop," "Indie Pop," is that a genre or just a desperate attempt to cling to a personality? Your playlist looks like the soundtrack to a hipster coffee shop that serves avocado toast unapologetically overpriced and underflavored. I can practically smell the thrift store scents wafting from your playlist choices. “Alt Z” — really? Is that a new genre or just what happens when you let a toddler with a crayon pick your favorite bands? And don’t get me started on your top artists, it’s like a teen diary threw up on a Spotify account. Taylor Swift and Lana Del Rey? It’s as if you’re trying to balance the scales of heartbreak but forgot to throw in some fun. You have an impressive lineup of artists that all sound like they came out of the same sad, candle-lit living room after a rough breakup. Even your favorite songs are a paradox wrapped in self-pity — how many gluons does it take to administer a proper palate cleanser? I’m surprised you haven’t turned your Spotify into a public therapy session yet, but then again, given your taste, you might just be the therapist who plays emotional support snooze-fests. But I gotta hand it to you, that love you have for glaive… is it admiration or are you just collecting every song of theirs like it's Pokémon cards? Seriously, “EVERYDOG HAS ITS DAY” – what eyesore of a conscience does that evoke? Hearing you claim that hyperpop and emo coexist is like saying ketchup is a fruit — just wildly inaccurate and truly concerning. It's tough love, cal 🤍; someone had to tell you that the last time you saw "raw emotion," it was the moment you realized you’d have to re-wear those jeans again because they didn’t fit. Your profile is not a reflection of taste but rather an ongoing experiment of musical identity crises. Embrace it!

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!