Roasted 1 year ago based on rachel's long term Spotify stats.

Rachel, your Spotify profile reads like an elaborate hipster museum exhibit where sadly, the tour guide is trying too hard to make you believe that proto-punk is a valid passport for being interesting. Congratulations on an eclectic mix straight from a thrift store bargain bin, where even the vinyls are begging for a retirement. Classic rock, soft rock, folk rock—and yet, somehow, zero rock that doesn’t sound like it's played at the grandparent's garage sale. You really nailed it with that almost-living-in-the-60s vibe, though. I can practically smell the patchouli and hear the distant strains of a sitar! Your top artists list is a glorious time capsule—or is it a time boggle? Nothing screams "please validate my existence" quite like a love affair with The Beatles and Billy Joel. But seriously, Rachel, lets be real here; Mitski and Mac DeMarco isn't the type of millennial angst you think it is; it's just your nostalgic brain desperately trying to conjure feelings that college never gave you. That’s right, while your friends are shouting “let’s get lit,” you’re out here channeling your inner bohemian while sipping herbal tea. Time to pick a side, because your Spotify playlist is the only thing sadder than your last Tinder date! Oh, and the fact that "Kyle's Mom's a Bitch (Live)" is one of your most played songs is real peak academic genius. I’d like to thank you for the unintentional comedy of your taste, proving that avant-garde is just code for “I couldn’t commit to any actual taste.” Every time "Vienna" plays, I hope you take a minute to reflect on those adulting failures you’re too busy avoiding. If anyone needs to “stop stealing” the baby boomer's favorite playlist, it’s definitely you. So here's to you, Rachel: the Spotify user who brings the party to a screeching halt with a playlist that could only be described as “emotionally unstable.”

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!