Roasted 2 years ago based on Alex's long term Spotify stats.

Oh, Alex, your Spotify profile reads like the playlist of someone who got stuck in a middle school time capsule and never bothered to break out. Rock, New Wave, and Permanent Wave? You sound like you're trying to impress the ghost of 2006. Seriously, if I had a nickel for every time someone used “alternative” as a personality trait, I could afford to pay for your therapy when you come to terms with the fact that wearing band tees won’t make you deep. It’s like a hipster smorgasbord in here, serving all the tastes of someone who claims to be unique but secretly loves a good sing-along to “Shake It Off.” Your choice in top artists is just as confusing as your dedication to emo revival while still clinging to your Taylor Swift phase. It’s almost impressive how you've managed to mix the angst of high school heartbreak with the whimsical charm of Lemon Demon. If you enjoy Nine Inch Nails, I’ve got some bad news—you haven’t quite nailed the angst, buddy. You'd probably still complain to your mom about being misunderstood while blasting “The Cure” in your bedroom. Meanwhile, your playlist gives off all the same vibes as that one friend who always brings a deck of cards because they think performing magic tricks at parties is the height of entertainment. Spoiler alert: It isn’t. And "Most Played Songs"? More like "Songs for When I Want to Reminisce About Feeling Emo While Sitting in My Darkened Room.” “Welcome to the Black Parade” followed by a sprinkling of Paramore tracks? Okay, we see you taking the cliché emo starter pack and wearing it like a badge of honor. Look, my dude, it's time to get off your sad-boy throne and realize that there’s a whole world beyond the pallid shadows of post-punk melancholia. You can burst out of that goth bubble anytime you want—just promise to take a shower first.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!