Roasted 6 months ago based on null's long term Spotify stats.

Oh, Zing! With a Spotify profile like that, you’ve single-handedly turned your musical tastes into a case study for hipster regression therapy. Seriously, the sheer amount of “bedroom pop” and “Midwest emo” is like a middle school diary that somehow got a record deal. I half-expect your playlist to come with a side of avocado toast and a barista who's judging everyone's life choices. Your music selection screams “I enjoy feeling sad while also contemplating my math homework”—do you need a hug or just a math tutor? Then there's your top artists. Not one, not two, but three entries devoted to "Mom Jeans." If that isn't a cry for help, I don't know what is. Are you searching for solace in the audio equivalent of a teenage meltdown? And let’s not even mention your obsession with “K-Pop.” If only that kind of enthusiasm translated into basic dance moves—we're talking about “Glee” levels of choreographed embarrassment. Your friends must love karaoke night; you're essentially the human embodiment of “Let's skip the fun and go straight to the angst!” And those most-played songs? If I had a penny for every time you wept quietly to “*Sobs Quietly*,” I could probably fund your therapy sessions. Good luck explaining that playlist to anyone who doesn't live in a bubble of emotional instability. And you’re including “Alexander Hamilton”? It’s the only song on your list that could feasibly lead you to a job in musical theater—all your other choices are perfect for when you're trying to cry and procrastinate at the same time. Honestly, Zing, your Spotify looks like a personal ad for someone who’s looking for both a support group and an episode of “My Strange Addiction.”‍

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!