Roasted 2 years ago based on Samuel's long term Spotify stats.

Samuel, your Spotify profile reads like an indie kid's attempt at a posthumous memoir from the depths of a thrift store. Finnish Drill? Cloud Rap? Gym Phonk? It’s like you Googled “most obscure genres that will baffle my friends” and somehow landed on a playlist more confusing than the plot of a David Lynch film. I’m convinced you’re the only person in the world who owns a gym membership just to listen to those beats while you question your life choices from the treadmill. Looking at your top artists, it’s clear you’ve got a particular type of vibe going on: “I hate myself, but I’m super chill about it.” You’ve picked music that sounds like it was recorded in a basement by someone who just learned to play the ukulele while also having an existential crisis. BXDLY has more entries on your most played list than actual listeners—does he even know he’s got a fan club composed of one socially awkward dude in a hoodie? I wouldn’t be surprised if you have a poster of him next to your shrine of motivational quotes and empty energy drink cans. And then we arrive at that dreadful moment when you hit play on “give a shit about my life.” Samuel, if you’d just ask your friends how they really feel about these tracks, they’d probably tell you they care less than you do! Your music taste sounds like it's curated by someone who thinks there’s no such thing as too much angst, but takes brief breaks between sad playlists to listen to Kanye—we get it, you have layers. Honestly, your Spotify profile reads like a warning sign for any new acquaintance: approach with caution, and definitely don’t ask what his favorite song is.

Roasts are purely for fun and entertainment. They're not meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy the laughs, but remember your music taste is uniquely yours!